Hardship

They going through their success, im falling through the cracks;
I hate when u promise a favor...but never getting it back;
The hate on my back, the struggle my stomach,
Im hungry for a meaning...but my heart doesnt want it;
I know they die from hunger, I know the rain brings thunder,
I practice my autograph...no longer attached with a number;
Cause athletes live that luxury, and my career is buggin me..they say I have million talents but neither of them is one to me;
From one too three...its miracles,
I shoot jumpshots, I talk alot, and I'm kind of lyrical;
But none of them is working out,
So tell me what I'm learning bout,
All the times I should be learning something I sit and burn..and moan and powt;
I hate myself, I love the mirror, just so I can see why I hate,myself,
They say I make them proud with no accomplishes under my belt;
So what I'm really thinking,
This ish just havent synced in,
Feel like they was symoblizing my career when they was trending planking;
Im drinking! Thoughts are all liquidized,
Stop doing basketball sucides...when I started thinkin suicide;
I smile but rude in eyes,
Like movie guys I act anothers life and put it in movie size;
And I wish I had a better clone,
A better home or left alone,
Or brain just like Sherlock Holmes;
I wasnt born with ish...in fact I lost alot,
My brother was enough, my word is all I got;
So F the world and all it got,
And kiss the sun just to be hot;
They say I'm great but really not,
Have so little but delt alot;
I just wish I had my life flipped,
Sick and tired of going through these hardships;...yea